What can I control?

When something goes wrong, it is easy for students and adults to focus all of their energy on what they wish were different.

They may not be able to control what another person says, whether they are included, the grade they already received, or an outcome that did not go as planned. They can control how they respond, the words they use, the effort they give, the boundaries they set, and the next step they take.

Our Circles of Control tool helps students make that distinction. It does not mean that the things outside their control no longer hurt or matter. It simply helps them move some of their energy away from what they cannot change and toward something they can do.

What story am I telling myself?

Students are not only responding to what happened. They are also responding to the story they begin telling themselves about what happened.

“I made a mistake” can quickly become “I’m terrible at this.”

“She didn’t sit with me today” can become “Nobody likes me.”

“This is hard” can become “I’ll never be able to do it.”

In Rise Girl, students practice noticing these thoughts and asking whether there could be another way to understand the situation. Is the story completely true? Is there another possible explanation? What would I say to a friend who was thinking this way?

Reframing is not about pretending that everything is wonderful. It is about helping students find a more honest and helpful way to think about a difficult moment so they can decide what to do next.

Who can help me?

We also want students to understand that handling hard things does not mean they have to handle everything alone.

Part of building independence is knowing when you need support, who you can trust, and how to ask for what you need. That support may come from a parent, teacher, counselor, coach, family member, friend, or another safe adult.

Sometimes a student needs advice. Sometimes she needs help solving a problem. Sometimes she simply needs someone to listen while she sorts through what she is feeling.

Helping students identify “their people” before a difficult moment happens makes it easier for them to reach out when they really need someone.

A Question to Try This Month

The next time a student brings you a difficult moment, you might resist the urge to immediately give her the answer. Instead, you could ask:

• What part of this can you control?

• What story are you telling yourself about what happened?

• Who could support you with this?

She may still need your help. She may not know which tool to choose right away, and the situation may not resolve neatly. That is okay. This is how the skills are built.

Every time a student pauses, considers her options, and chooses a next step, she is getting more practice handling what life brings her.

Why This Matters at School

Stress and difficult emotions do not stay neatly outside the classroom. They can show up as avoidance, shutdown, conflict, disengagement, difficulty focusing, or constantly needing an adult to step in and solve the problem.

That is why teaching students how to regulate their emotions, work through challenges, rethink an unhelpful thought, and ask for support is not separate from learning. These skills help create the conditions students need to stay connected, recover from difficult moments, and return to what they are there to do.

A student with a strong toolbox will still experience friendship problems, frustration, mistakes, disappointment, and stress. The difference is that she is beginning to trust that she can move through those moments. She knows there are things she can try, choices she can make, and people she can turn to.

That is the kind of confidence we want to help students build, not the belief that hard things will not happen, but the belief that they can handle themselves when they do.

How Rise Girl Helps

Rise Girl gives schools a structured and engaging way to help girls build confidence, strengthen their connections, and practice the skills they need for real life.

Through guided lessons, journaling, honest conversations, and interactive experiences, girls do more than hear good advice. They practice using tools for handling stress, friendship challenges, mistakes, self-doubt, and situations that do not go as planned.

Because the best time to build a toolbox is not in the middle of the hardest moment. It is before she needs it.

Your students are already facing hard things. Rise Girl can help give them the tools to handle what comes next.

Looking for a meaningful way to help students handle the hard moments?

Students will face friendship challenges, stress, setbacks, and moments when they simply don’t know what to do next. Rise Girl™ and Rise Guy™ give schools a structured, practical way to help students build confidence and practice the tools they can reach for when those moments happen.

If you’re looking for a way to give your girls or boys more opportunities to build those skills, we’d love to talk. No pressure, just a real conversation about what your students need and whether Rise Girl™ or Rise Guy™ might be a good fit.

Let’s Talk — Book a Call

Thank you for the work you do every day to help students feel supported, capable, and ready for what comes next.